The Cap Chronicles Part 17 - A Tool Not A Cure…
So the 3 Cap Orange-tek, which sat overnight and really was given enough time to react with the acids in the juice went well. Strong effects and chill AF that day. I listened to classical music for my anchor, which is on right now in the background and I got things done with little to know anxiety or angst.
The next day the effects were weaning off and I remembered I saved the shortcut to my homescreen, so I loaded up the classical station again. It feels a little like a placebo, as the music is calming usually anyways. I noticed that if anything got me upset is got me less upset and events that might make me tense made me less tense.
I noticed my ability to stay focused began to slide back to “ADD Land” so I did my best not to beat myself up and breathe in deeply, which I believe will be another good anchor to do as a physical reminder of a calm and focused state. Again, another activity that creates that state anyway. I reminded myself how much time I had in the day. I reminded myself that if “it took all day so be it.” I pointed out to myself that “I have a few deadlines for various errands but I am so so lucky to be safe and warm and have a belly full of food. I have wifi, I have machines to help gather information and connect with business and pleasure, I am abundant regardless of anything.”
I’ve been obsessed over going to the food bank today to help survive. I’m concerned they’ll give me too much food and it will go to waste. I’m not concerned about them running out, I still have resources. And then…